SCRIPTURE FOR TODAY
"If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned we make Him a liar, and the word is not in us." 1John1:8-10 (N.K.J.V.)
LATE LIFE LOVES
When we get passed the age of 50 or so, most of us have been either married and or divorced with children. Personally, I've had two failed marriages and I am not proud of that but in our culture we are brought up to believe that divorce is always an option if we are not happy with our spouse for any reason.... God hates a divorce and He says so in His Word and the only grounds for a divorce are adultery.
I hear about couples being married 20, 30, and 40 years and just up and get a divorce because "they just aren't happy," or, one partner did something to cause the other to loose trust, maybe lied to them or stole from them, even disagreements about children and grandchildren. Some of us who became believers later in life are even using the Word to justify divorce using the scripture that says "let us not be unevenly yoked" referring to one of the couple being a non-believer. There are many "reasons" in our society today by which we justify divorce.... That does not make it right and I believe God punishes us in certain ways when we go against His Word.
So, now if you are happily married or unhappily married considering divorce this post is for you and if you are divorced and single and in a girl-friend, boyfriend kind of a union then maybe you will relate to this post.
Generally, people, at least one out of the two who divorce find themselves lonely after a while and really not very happy. So they will pursue another partner and try to get back something they've lost. Companionship, even with an undesirable partner is still sometimes better than loneliness and lack, and separation from family members that they still love, children, grandchildren, in-laws, family friends who have know them for years. Now the punishment starts. The heart ache begins.
So, to try and fill the void, we will look for someone else to help relieve the pain. Some of us try out new partners and sometimes we are blessed to find the "one" that works the very first try. Others of us struggle, building walls around us that no one can climb and calling ourselves justified and happy without regret or concern. But, we still want the benefits of love without the commitment. We crave intimacy, closeness, conversation, and yes, sex... Now anxiety, loneliness, fear, doubt, uncertainty, and if you are a believer, guilt and condemnation.... Of course, God will forgive us our sins if we confess our sins but the problem does not go away, we still yearn for what was missing or lacking. Just someone eat dinner with or to hold at night, to tell your darkest secrets and your deepest thoughts... Now, let's say you find someone that you are attracted to and fall in love. Right away you start thinking "forever" thoughts. Now, maybe another marriage should be in order. Wow, are you sure? What about the kids? The grandkids? Friends and other relatives? Money? Is everyone else in your life going to approve of your new found love? You may say, "it doesn't matter what they all think," well hold your horses now, when you're in your fifties or sixties and you are established in life, maybe retired, things can get real complicated. They are all kinds of issues to consider.
By this time in life most of us are set in our ways and where we live and we devote our time accordingly, be it with a career, a job, a hobby, friends and other family, or maybe grand kids. If we have been alone any length of time we are set in our ways and some of us are perfectly content to just leave everything the same, except for the desire for intimacy and closeness with someone we can relate to and just be with, without that "forever" commitment. Here's where someone's gonna get hurt.....
So, we look for, and find that someone and we give them all the love and affection we can, we go 'all the way,' if you know what I mean. For a believer, we have committed sin and knowing this, the guilt and condemnation moves in and with it, changes in behavior. If it continues, week after week, then month after month, and still no commitment... At least one of the two will require and need some kind of reassurance that this relationship will be a permanent, lasting, a secure thing... Marriage. Here's where the heartache comes for one or the other or both... One rejects the idea of marriage and leaves the other discouraged, insecure, and heart- broken. Now what? Apologies come. Because one of the partners will not give the other what they need to feel whole and happy and secure in life resentment grows and things change. Heart ache sets in and maybe it's time to call it quits and try again.......? More apologies. But hopefully there is no hatred or hard feelings and that couple can still be friends and stay in touch even though the love they shared with each other fizzled out for what ever reason... Late life loves are not that easy to manage, and far more complicated than we can realize and maybe we should consider no love at all. No love at all?
I think that is easier said than done for most of us. We are created to love and be loved. God made us the way we are. We are His handy work and masterpiece. I thank Him everyday for the blessings he rains down on this sinful person that I am. And I pray that He will take away wrong desires and thoughts from me and let me bring glory and honor to His name. But He made me with these desires and tendencies. I have these weaknesses in my flesh that seem uncontrollable and He has yet to relieve me of these and I struggle with them everyday. I know not everyone can relate to this post and I pray that if you are facing this kind of challenge, be careful, and be prayerful, maybe in the not to distant future God will set us free or give us what we need to fill the void in our lives we so urgently desire. We are all "works in progress." He is not finished with us yet...... I trust in Him....
PRAYER FOR TODAY
Father God, I thank You for all my blessings. For the beauty that surrounds me and all the family and friends and loved ones in my life. Help me not to hurt anyone You put in my life. You direct our paths Lord, help us to be where we need to be to do Your will and bring glory and honor to Your name. Protect us from the schemes and plans the enemy makes to destroy us and let us have victory in every area of our lives. Peace, security, health, and freedom. Give us our hearts desire if it is in line with Your Word and help us to understand You and forgive us where we fall into sin and wrong behavior. Help us to believe right things and reject the wrong thoughts that creep into our minds.... Thank You for forgiving me for all my sins and for being my Father and my God... In the name of Jesus, Yeshua, our King and Lord... Make it so...
